:: ★Dream BIG ☆ ::

2012-01-26T01:10:00.002+08:00

i was dropped a bomb shell today.

it seems like this is the trend. each time something happened, the end result is... there's no need to explain anymore because it has happened. most of the time, it's miscommunication that you're trying to explain. Communication is so so so important...

2012-01-17T23:59:00.002+08:00

it feels so bad to hear your boss "scolding" you/getting disappointed at you. damn it. i've been struck by streaks of bad lucks this few days. got ticketed by police, wasted by time running up and down to get my reading materials done, getting screwed by boss, not being able to watch my movie,forgot to bring back my contact lenses, punctured tyre, unable to find my book online; resulting in many unnecessary sourcing,cash running out,being told i'm not possibly passing my interview... in a nutshell, nothing is running smooth... damn it... very good example of FML.

2011-10-26T03:00:00.002+08:00

this is quick... my 2nd semester of postgraduate studies is coming to an end!

2011-08-18T21:12:00.001+08:00

today's not a very good day.

2011-07-12T01:11:00.003+08:00

slowly getting back into business. i asked my lecturer about choosing one of the modules he's teaching in the coming semester. He's my previous teacher in Large Scale Systems Engineering. He concluded that I will like it. Well, I felt happy because I had interacted with him several times and he's giving me his personal opinions based on my interest. but on the other hand, this module is too subjective. His answer is "it depends" most of the time, and I have to think like what he's thinking or have a judgmental statement. ultimately, i hope this module is going to help me in pulling up my core modules scores because most of the time, core modules are killer! @.@

2011-05-31T11:24:00.005+08:00

I was quite expression-less yesterday and prolly today too. I didn't do badly but didn't do greatly as well. studied so hard, but reaped something slightly below what I had expected. Typically for that one module, didn't expect it to be that bad. Such high benchmarking, modules that I had thought would score didn't turn out to be that way. *confused*

It's a wake-up call. So, I'm preparing myself to benchmark higher, dream big. and my new motto now is "Dream BIG", to remind myself that I need to move forward and not disappoint the people around me.

Off to Taiwan soon for a backpacking experience, i call it, "My Amazing Race!".

2011-05-29T19:40:00.000+08:00

ROAR! I'm rejuvenated to work HARD!!! towards to better quality of life!

2011-05-06T07:59:00.005+08:00

i'm done with the first semester!!! :D I survived the first semester! =) gosh... i can't believe it... hahaha... it's great to wake up the first day not needing to worry about what to you need to read up on and what deadlines to follow... what can i summarize from the first semester? The stress was straight at the beginning of first day i started my class. Almost everyday I feel the stress, the number of reading materials to catch up. the main issue is mostly that there's no fixed boundary to what you should study. the more you study, the more you understand the syllabus. I must say that in this four months of study period, I learnt so many many many things! They're very useful in stimulating critical thinking... I had even went through things that were out of my scope. I can tell you that I understand the modules I'm studying at this level compared to undergraduate time. What I can say is that graduate course is the real starting point to venture into a study of a particular course. Undergraduate was merely just a platform to get you suited to university life. Again, maybe it's because of the course that I am currently doing or the university structure. I'll get charged up for the next tough semester. Apparently next semester would be tougher than this because of the Operation Research and Probabilistic & Statistics modules that are considered toughest in Industrial Engineering course that're highly sought after.

The frustraton now is... I put on weight! that's the drawback. I seriously didn't had time to enjoy myself or time to do my hobbies. So my agenda now is to lose weight... =)

My Philiphino housemate's left and back to his country. I'm next. Well, I gonna miss staying in this house. Despite some of the complaints, everything else were good! complaint is a normal thing tho, and it should NOT be seen negatively. It's impossible everything's perfect on you. and there won't be changes or improvements if you don't complain and criticize... that's also why Singapore has better standards than Malaysia! Singaporeans like to complain complain and complain! =)

Once again, I think I had matured throughout this four months...

arranged marriage

2011-05-02T19:40:00.004+08:00

Arranged Marriage

yes... i've been speaking to some Pakistani and Indian friends. It's true tho. most of them still believe in arrange marriages. They actually believe that real relationship understanding comes after marriages. Of course, it's arranged marriages and not forced marriages. There's a big difference. I guess the underlying reason that arranged marriage works is through the culture itself. One has to know thoroughly understand their role well in a relationship... and ready to make changes through discovery.(e.g. there's a girl in my block doing a ph.D, she will be meeting her husband-to-be for the first time in Singapore while their marriage is arranged sometime ago.) In oppose to the conventional relationships we always say, both have their pros and cons. Either type of relationship would work out, it just depends on the mentality of the person and how they believe in a relationship and how they want to execute them.

2011-05-02T09:40:00.002+08:00

so apparently my roommate and I were back in good terms... ??? -.-"

man... i can't wait to go back! 7 more days! it's time for me to free my mind... keep fit!!! my mind's seriously going crazy... appparently there's a free SPA session for students here by counselling unit as part of effort to manage stress. I'm up for it! :D well... of course! what'd u expect from masters,,,

2011-04-25T22:24:00.003+08:00

this is a simple example of why is it difficult to live with someone else in a house.

it started off when i jokingly expressed my frustration and belief. and he felt it. worse still... with his wrong mentality and wrong approach, he took it badly. =) maybe i should not have posted this.

anyway, i had thought that he's impractical. because the house is so small, it's just 5 seconds to walk from 1 end to the other. and he thought about a duty roster as if it's a big organisation. I mean, we're grown up and need not be told what to do and when to do. And for sure, you don't even need a duty roster to tell u to clean up whatever you have left behind (i.e. after eating).

Worse till, he is a weird guy... with all his weird behaviour and weird thinking. just makes me frown most of the time.

2011-04-22T01:16:00.000+08:00

this video is too nice to be shared. sorry...

2011-04-20T22:38:00.001+08:00

2011-04-19T13:34:00.003+08:00

for two weeks, i'll be eating at the same place, facebooking at the same time, studying at the same spot, sleeping on the same bed.

Essence of LSSE

2011-04-18T19:03:00.002+08:00

A quote given by my lecturer in Large Scale Systems Engineering at the beginning of the semester...

"This is the approach we take to all our major decisions,... be guided by facts; assess costs and benefits, both social and economic, tangible and intangible; take a holistic approach; adopt a long-term perspective; not to be swayed by emotion or populism; then excercise judgement; and in good time, with due deliberation, make a decision and implement it well." - Lee Hsien Loong (2005)

2011-04-17T21:53:00.001+08:00

it's relatively easy to know people, but it's tough to bid farewell...

2011-04-17T01:11:00.005+08:00

i just felt like,,,,, i want to be special in some ways... i have many WANTS in life. just sad that i'm being greedy in a way because I already have what i NEED yet seeking for the EXTRA things in life. I don't know... I just want to make things great! do something special! make people happy... one thing for sure is life doesn't come easy. if it was easy, you wouldn't probably understand what life is about. i can't force things to be the way i want, but i'll give my 100% attitude.

*whoever reads, sorry... most of the time you wouldn't understand what I'm writing because whenever I write, i just write whatever comes to my mind and i can't find ways to define the complexity in my mind. thanks for following anyway.*

I'm still thinking what should I do for the summer. Among things that are in my mind are,

1) Going back to my primary school to be a temporary teacher. I had the vision of trying to educate the "hopeless" kids, look into their minds and problems... just so that they don't see themselves hopeless and change for the better in future. All because I was one of the "hopeless" before.

i trully understand how I angered my class teacher last time for i was the brat in the class. she looks quite old now, probably it was because of me. *guilty*. Just thought of going back and work hand-in-hand with her for a short period of time. She complained to me that kids nowadays are even tougher to manage than me.

2) join an intern programme in politics. well, just out of curiousity.

3) do some research work on political science and write up on some articles related to politics?

4) catching the NBA Playoffs is a definite.

2011-04-15T00:00:00.004+08:00

all time favourite anime. perhaps it's the only few animes i'd watched since i was young. just love this story. definitely love baskeball! keke...

I had always liken myself to the main character, hanamichi sakuragi-kun. =) the girl in this anime's sweet tho. ^^ it's quite a funny yet interesting anime.

complimentary, for passion of basketball ;-) Playoff is coming... just can't wait to watch my favourite team. kekeke...

2011-04-14T13:52:00.003+08:00

as things are coming towards the end of semester, i'm starting to feel a relieved cuz I'm almost done with the first ever studious experience in university. Or at least I got clear with my modules. i thought i was studious enough last time. this is worse. =) only thing now is catching up with all the syllabus taught in less than 2 weeks time. seems like i have no choice but to answer every questions in exam. graduate life is hell hectic after all. can't wait for a break to recharge.

will you remember me? i will remember you.

2011-04-02T22:58:00.003+08:00

As I wondered, how many people actually remembered the people that had passed through in their lives? Be it just somebody as acquainted as hi-bye, everybody that existed in your live definitely impacted you to what you are now. Most of the time, these people flash back into my mind once a while. How it was wished the things could go further and understand the person, and things would stay the same. Enjoy the MV.

blank book?

2011-03-15T12:30:00.004+08:00

what does it mean if a girl tells you she's reading a blank book?

when you asked her what kind of "books" attract her. and she said a blank book. books would implicitly mean boys.

I wish I knew the answer.

2011-03-09T22:08:00.002+08:00

ok... got screwed by the first term paper. T.T Open Book Exams are seriously useless. you literally don't need the book because the questions will most probably be based on understandings and you won't find similar questions repeating. I guess this lecturer was trying to "trick" us. Again, I guess I would still do wrongly no matter how much revision I do because it's all about understanding the questions and being calm enough in the exam while racing against time. hate it... Prolly this is defines NUS.

2011-03-05T20:47:00.002+08:00

sometimes among the most developed countries people always thought about high quality of life, everybody feeling happy, everybody's have enough food to eat, everybody's good incomes, and everybody cool... Those places like Hong Kong, Singapore, United States... you would prolly think about those. Well, there's the other side... so far most places i visited in US or Singapore.

In SG, I am staying at a HDB flat - low cost flats build by HDB. I was looking into households and I tried to look into their lives... sometimes it's quite sad to see people trying to survive and earn a living. I just had my dinner at a place - "Dosa Point", it's actually a place that sells very cheap roti prata/roti canai, dosa/tosai, and uttapham... the most indians have their humble dinner there. there are some minority chinese though. In my view, this stall's basically keeping them survive. I'd imagine it, trying to save every pence and penny.

Sometimes this changes my perspective about life. In the end, all I am capable of doing now is looking into the sky and wonder...

2011-03-05T16:16:00.004+08:00

sometimes it's very frustrating to not learn from mistakes... >.

graduation

2011-03-04T14:33:00.000+08:00

2011-02-21T02:38:00.005+08:00

Hrmm... Do you think you are not what you think you are? Or perhaps. There's actually other side of you that you have not discovered? The evil side, to be exact. Or sometimes your talent. My belief's that no matter how noble or good a person can be, there's always the darker side in the person. Most of the time we're suppressing it. I'd always thought my temper has long gone. The REAL temper that's vulnerable. When I was playing basketball, i got quite frustrated and high tempered because there was a guy being very aggressive that could injure people without knowing. At least my friends and I nearly got injured by him. Actually this guy is slightly mentally disabled.I don't think he knows what happening and all he'd think about is whatever he was doing was "cool" and "right". That's why I didn't fight back anyhow. But somehow my temper was there and I felt that it could explode, till one point that I might unintentionally kill the person. I don't know but somehow all these scenarios came into mind. Perhaps it'd be true that if you've thought through it, most likely you wouldnt do anything stupid simply cuz it was thought through. It's like The Hulk feeling, haha... Or Dr Jackyll to Mr. Hyde feeling. Actually, these feelings only arise when I was playing against this guy. Which leads to me thinking that when somebody is too engrossed/focused in something, he wouldn't know what actually happening, like all of a suddenly the whole body/mind is taken control by another medium.

Hrmmz... I'm learning to understand myself and control my negative feelings though. It's seriously not easy. But I'm glad that I have the mindset of wanting to change myself all these while and I actually did make some changes in myself. :)

2011-02-13T01:36:00.003+08:00

sometimes i really ask myself this question, why am I not forgetting? I guess I'm in love with the heart. her heart.

and guess what, suddenly I saw a vision of myself walking around europe. And I'm quite determined that I'm going to make it happen. And the time I'm giving myself would be 2012! NEXT YEAR!

Going back and seeing everybody during CNY had been great! Though I felt homesick a little after I came back. Looking forward for some basketball session next week when I go back.

So far, studies has been fine. I would say, I'm keeping with the pace. Not left behind yet. and God bless! Masters FOR THE WIN! =)

just the way you are...

2011-01-13T00:34:00.003+08:00

shhh... i dreamt about her yesterday actually... well... though it's just a dream, it's SO SWEET! she's sweet anyway... ^^

2011-01-11T11:22:00.002+08:00

feeling a little tough living now... been having some problems with graduate studies... initially i was having trouble getting suited with the accomodation, and now i'm having trouble getting suited with the modules or selecting modules I want. Apparently it's very hard to get things into your hands. You spent so much time figuring out which modules to take, and then you got to know that you couldn't choose those. And then you spent so much time planning the rest of the modules that might not necessary mean you will get them. I have not even faced the trouble with studying the modules yet. @.@ sigh... I'm feeling stupid. Sometimes I come to ask myself, why am I taking such an extra mile and trouble to do this course? then I tried to convince myself, I wanted to have a change of field. And there goes the doubt of what I want in future and whether I can just do it with my current situation. And I'm convincing myself that Bachelor's degree is just not enough to excel. I just wanted things to be easier for myself in future.

Sometimes it's such an irony that I'm in a department that's about efficiency and getting problems solved but this very fundamental problem isn't solved for so long.

Dear God, please help/bless me.

2011-01-03T22:17:00.002+08:00

to myself :

just when you have to take matters to yourself, just when there's no point thinking about crying, just when you have to learn to live on your own, just when it's up to you to make your own decision... you're part of growing up and you live with it.

2010-12-29T02:25:00.002+08:00

what? I just got back from SG again for the Registration Day. guess what? I feel a lil moody again when it sort of took me 45minutes to 1hr to reach my accomodation by public transport. I don't know... I hope I'll feel like a student staying there since it's far from university. I need a life as a postgraduate student. Again... I felt even moody-ier when I discovered all my timetables are from 6pm-9pm... no morning classes... yeah... all night classes for the part-timer's sake. I'm thinking, WHAT ABOUT BASKETBALL?! what about my life? All my life will be in the morning! I seriously want to play basketball... :-( I LOVE YOU BASKETBALL...

Trying to be optimistic, I guess this will last for 8 months if I were to take 4+4 modules, and leave it with 2 more modules and I'll try to go with an internship while studying plan, as suggested by my cousin. I don't feel like mugging on books for the whole semester without sports...

2010-12-15T17:15:00.003+08:00

gosh... just felt emo the whole day because of my accomodation. I couldn't get my primary choice which's much nearer compared to the secondary one. :( On second thought, after reading the terms and conditions I got emo too cuz I won't have that much of freedom like how it's gonna be in my house... cuz i'll be sharing room and also sharing a living room. Of course... worried about thief... Nothing I could do but just that I wished there is single room option. How I'm all emo because I don't feel like travelling so far from my accomodation. Trying hard to live with it now. I hate this feeling!!! =(

dreaming again...

2010-12-06T03:25:00.002+08:00

Hrmmz... What's there? I'm just few weeks away to starting my new chapter.

Here again... I'm dreaming... I don't know why... but I love to dream, perhaps dreaming makes life more imaginative. I wonder how should I paint my life. I mean, there're so much things that I can do out there besides working. So many things to see in the world. Besides working straight after I graduate. There are places I wish to visit/travel... like Taiwan, Russia, Japan... I think I'm gonna do it again in Summer 2012. I just felt like exploring UK. Haha... the plan's still so far away... Frankly speaking, surviving in Russia will be the coolest thing on earth since I can't speak Russian and have to rely on Julia! =) There're so much of culture to explore in these countries like Ukraine and Russia... they are SOOOOOO different from the usual English-speaking countries...

2010-11-18T01:58:00.002+08:00

so far I would say life has been how I planned it to be.

I had gone to US to learn to be independent, to suffer and understand how it's like to live in incomplete/uncomfortable manner and also to expand my horizons on how advance the outside world is compared to my country, Malaysia. I would say that the experience in US has changed my life slightly. The mentality and cultural lifestyle is so much different being in Asia(or specifically just Malaysia) and United States. Of course, I picked up the good habits and that is my intention. I came back with a stronger query wondering why is Malaysia still looking the same while China and Singapore advanced so much faster. It IS and always been because of POLITICS. Politics controls a country and a country controls the citizen which then shapes the citizens. How is it possible that Singapore was once at the same pace as Malaysia just before they split became so advanced? You will see all sorts of dumb excuses given by local politicians.

Secondly, I had been given an offer to National University of Singapore(NUS) which seems to be the place I wish to do Masters, understanding that studying in US or UK will cost unnecessary expenditure. Besides the ranking of the university, the reason I chose Singapore is to fully understand the lifestyle of Singaporeans, in other words, the kiasu-ness. I highly anticipate that I will come back being a more hardworking person and able to take challenges at the tip of my fingers. Of course, I'm getting myself prepared for the stresses. And of course, I had been having nightmares. swt...

The next task would be observing whether I am able to slog through a Singaporean university for 2 semesters or not and followed up by observing how my 1st job would end up like.

Everytime seems to be the beginning...

2010-07-13T12:32:00.002+08:00

Just watched She's Out of My League few minutes ago. Well... it was quite a normal story to be honest. But these kinda love story still creates impact of our life, especially mine. Nothing beated the ending of the movie. It truly believe in the power of love towards the other half that would lead a person to a success in life. That was partly the reason why I like this movie. Which also describes that I'm still looking for the other half that will create an impact in my life. ^^

2010-07-03T20:50:00.002+08:00

There're some people I wish I could've known more or known better to understand them. Sometimes I do dream about these people. Sometimes, I do wish things could be the way I wished. ^^ Nevertheless, I should be optimistic. "God has better plans for me"

Anyways, I'm in US trying to understand the culture and the lifestyle here. Hopefully I can experience as much as I can. Will try to update on that soon. so longggg!!!

2010-06-03T23:51:00.002+08:00

it's been a busy week trying to prepare myself for Work and Travel to US. In a way, I feel lazy to go... but I'm still gonna go, I wanna explore! I wanna know! ^^. Tomorrow will be quite busy again... till then it's Saturday and I'm off... I somehow feel that I have a lot of undone things... hrmmz... Will update on this 4 months trip. =)

Baba Yetu!!!

2010-05-18T13:25:00.004+08:00

Baba yetu Our Father

Baba yetu, yetu uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina||| In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Baba yetu, yetu uliye |||Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina||| In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Utupe leo chakula chetu ||| Give us today our food
Tunachohitaji utusamehe ||| We need you to forgive us
Makosa yetu, hey ||| Our errors, hey
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe |||As we do forgive those
Waliotukosea, usitutie ||| Who did us wrong, don't put us
Katika majaribu, lakini ||| Into trials, but
Utuokoe, na yule, ||| Save us, with him, for ever and ever
milele na milele |||

Baba yetu, yetu uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina |||In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Baba yetu, yetu uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina||| In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Ufalme wako ufike utakalo |||Your kingdom come that it be
Lifanyike duniani kama mbinguni, |||done on earth as in heaven, amen
amina

Baba yetu, yetu uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina |||In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Baba yetu, yetu uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Mbinguni yetu, yetu, amina |||In heaven, our, our, amen
Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father, who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Utupe leo chakula chetu ||| Give us today our food
Tunachohitaji utusamehe ||| We need you to forgive us
Makosa yetu, hey ||| Our errors, hey
Kama nasi tunavyowasamehe |||As we do forgive those
Waliotukosea, usitutie ||| Who did us wrong, don't put us
Katika majaribu, lakini ||| Into trials, but
Utuokoe na yule msiba milele |||Save us from this distress for ever

Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

Baba yetu, yetu, uliye ||| Our, our Father who are
Jina lako litukuzwe ||| Let's glorify your name

2010-05-17T00:40:00.010+08:00

Views can be very different as time passes because you develop a different thinking as you approach different situations. At one point before this, you might wonder or even start blaming a person for doing hurtful things to you. It was a decision made, but now I'm happy for her. I wanted to open our minds and look wider. I guess she would be in better position now, favouring her criterias. It's definitely undoubtful he'll be the person to strengthen your faith and lead you the way you wished. Am I not right she's happier now?

I knew things would change and I definitely knew her too well. Of course, I knew where I'm standing - that if I don't strive hard this time for this degree, my life and career is gonne be diminished. That's why I chose to concentrate on studies more. Prolly that's the reason why God has been keeping me this way. I believe she's a better person now of course, and I believe she will be good in handling the relationship, and he will be able to tolerate her. I'm quite confident about it. =)

Well even though things have changed, she's definitely not gonna be out of my mind because obviously she gave the strongest impact in my life. From the beginning till the end, I've it flashed in my mind from time to time. I'm not gonna say anything else, but I will definitely miss her being someone special in heart. Part of the reason I decided or I'm trying my best to be in touch with her because I had this strong mindset; even though we can't be together, we can still be friends to support each other, or by the time we look back, we'd prolly be sitting down and saying, "look! we're still best friends!". It's how life's gonna be and we can't expect things to turn out the way we always wished for. There's eternity and the only thing you can do is appreciate the piece of presence. I still keep her things and I would not prolly shy away from it - it's a motivation and it's a memory.

I have too many undecided plans and I wished things could be much simpler. To be, with all these uncertainties, I can't commit in a relationship because the focus is not gonna be there. I'm ending my final year and guess what, I'm not a relieved yet. There's no relief btw.

And whether or not you believe me, my mind is thinking more than i'm trying here and i'm just trying to put it in words before I read it back in time to come. She'd prolly be prouder than me or forgotten me now, I don't know? or maybe she's halfway through her happiness. That's not my concern actually. People always say, forget about the past and look ahead for the future. In reality, this is not the way, because the past highlights your mistakes and it will be the core of shaping a person. Learning from the past means creating a better future.

2010-04-25T08:30:00.010+08:00

got up with sweet dreams... things can happen in so many ways when we're dreaming. it's been a while since i have good dreams. by the time I got up, things are back to THE REALITY again. THE REALITY means, things don't go the way you want them to go, they don't wait for you, and you're competing with somebody. it's about survival instinct. now I start to think, how to make dreams real? there seems to be only an answer : working towards the dream - working hard. I always believe things won't come unless you go get it. If you ask me, where do I see myself in 5 years time, I don't know because things aren't seem to be sailing smooth.

It's difficult to explain to people what u're doing and why you're doing it just because you have strong intuitions for the person.

Listened to a radio conversation recently on 98.8fm. DJ Chan Foong reiterated me that I need to start changing myself. Will be working on that. =) This is kinda funny but it seriously leads me to telling what I'm looking for in my other half - the ability to change me. It's not easy to change myself, even my parents can't change me easily.

and yeah... before I pen off, I got a motivating quote from Datuk Tony Fernandas,
"You’ve got to benchmark yourself against the best, otherwise don’t bother being in it."

praying hard...

2010-04-23T12:35:00.001+08:00

dear god... please please please... it's been very tough road to try and get a place into NTU for MSc. please grant me this appeal... for the sake of everything...

FYP-free

2010-04-15T20:21:00.002+08:00

there're no words to express my delight after finishing my Final Yr. Project. it's been 9 months. and the worry has been on more than 9 months!!! the fear is gone now... woooooow!!! =) =D ;-) now... Heat Transfer coursework(due tmr) and Control and Instrumentation coursework left before I'm focused in killing the exam.

2010-04-05T08:22:00.003+08:00

life's such... things were so so so much difference in d outside world. so many things went into my mind yesterday when I watched F1 racing yesterday. Things started picturing when we sneaked into the pitstop and working area of all the F1 crews. I started questioning myself... how can they be in this position right now? all the working environment... whatever technology i'm seeing... i wished I could be part of it! We saw so many celebrities... so many F1 drivers behind the scenes working on, discussing... I wished I could be as professional one day, even though not in F1.

And yeah... one thing I was so proud of... I took a picture with Jenson Button's GF! hahaha...

梁静茹 - 如果有一天

2010-03-26T01:56:00.000+08:00

如果有一天 - 梁静茹歌词
词:易齐曲:郭文贤
现在也只能欣赏
唯一的合照一张
淡忘了的是那个街角
想念的是当时的微笑
生活中交错失望
越想念就越孤单
若再被寂寞迎头赶上
多感伤原来只是正常
你是不是也在品尝
一个人的咖啡和天光
是不是也忽然察觉到
多出时间看天色的变换
如果有一天我们再见面
时间会不会倒退一点
也许我们都忽略
互相伤害之外的感觉
如果哪一天我们都发现
好聚好散不过是种遮掩
如果我们没发现
就给彼此多一点时间

Annual Dinner 2010

2010-03-23T17:29:00.003+08:00

The Annual Dinner was great. Somehow I felt kinda disappointed because initially I wanted to dance with a person and unfortunately... I guess this is gonna be my last year of my university life *reluctance* unless I get into Nanyang Technological University for MSc which I pray hard I do get an offer. Life's uncertain here...

2010-03-18T23:39:00.001+08:00

haihz... im trying to control myself nowadays... I think I really know what's mood swinging now... with the stresses and all... sigh...

2010-03-17T22:30:00.001+08:00

damn it... suddenly got so many things to do at one time... sigh... I don't like this man... this are coming to a deadline and there're so many things not done yet! aihhzzzz

=S

2010-03-11T23:31:00.003+08:00

what else there is to complain about me? I guess I'm pretty much doing a good boy job rather than hanging around at places till late night(i.e really late night). I guess I should be respected for the things I love to do and not complained and grumble about it.

I guess all you wanted was a satisfying results from me and I'm doing my best to get good grades. Again, it's still impossible to ask for things specifically at specific times(i.e. demanding).

Study > Rest > Basketball/Sports > Sleep > Study > Sleep = that is just the stupid routine that I'm following all these while. I don't really watch tv anyways. So what's to grumble about my Basketball time? I spend an average of 3 hours every Mon, Wed, and Friday to keep myself stress-free, keep myself athletic, keep myself healthy. And I'm said to be going against you. Who is so free to go against you?

8am-5pm : Spent this 9hrs doing academic work in school
5-6:30pm : Spent this 1 hr to travel and rest
6:30 - 10:30pm : Spent this extended 4 hrs to do sports and release stress and have dinner
10:30 - 11:15pm : 45 minutes of rest.
11:15pm - 3pm : Spent 3hrs 45 min of studying.
3pm - 8am : 5 hours of sleep

(9+3.75)/24hrs * 100 = 53% of the time I spend mostly on my academic work. What else to complain? I'm maximising it already!

Basketball starts at 7+pm where most professional players arrive. Then only I start playing... Occasionally the unexpected crowd came, and I've gotta wait for extra time for another round to play, that's the reason for playing longer till 10pm. I still don't understand, what's there to make noise about? I'm pretty much aware of my own safety already.

grumble... grumble and grumble... Can't I do my own things my own way? Things got to be mutual. I give you this, you give me that... I still don't understand...

2010-03-06T21:10:00.002+08:00

havn't got the time to write something on or rather don't feel like writing. I wished I have the opportunity to continue my studies with a masters. I guess that would be my last stop for academic qualifications that's gonna be engineering related.

There's something to ponder about. What's the biggest challenge? I guess I have to agree that the biggest challenge a person will face is changing themselves. Most ppl always want to stay in their comfort zone and being who they think they're meant to be. Do you think asking ppl to accept you for who you are is the correct thinking? It depends, I think if it's a bad habit or something negative, we should kick it and change. Or improve for the better. It's almost absurd to say that "that's me! I can't help it!", but sometimes it's just too hard to admit that it's up to determination to change oneself. I noticed some ppl can change physically, but they can still be the very same mentally. Vice versa...

2010-02-24T00:12:00.001+08:00

many things are going through my mind now... another stage of dilemma... aihz... sial la... sien la...

penny counts...

2010-02-12T10:43:00.006+08:00

part of me is asking me to study further and gain better knowledge, and the other part is asking me to get my ass out and work. work to get my hard earned money so that I can spend it without needing to ask for reimbursement. somehow I can't wait to finish the studying stage because I don't feel like asking my parents for money anymore. I guess I've already controlled my spending, but it's just that certain things that I need to change and purchase to replace the old ones. I don't think i'm the kid who spends so often. Besides bringing a girl out, treating her which I havn't done for a long long time, I hardly go to the shopping mall to buy stuffs even tho I wished to buy everything I see.

I know it's not good to make comparisons, but I guess asking for money is the most awkward thing that'll ever occur to me. Funnily, asking from friends(buddies) was fairly much easier than I thought.

The question now is, where the fark I find money from?! The only way I could think of is formal working. I don't think I'd like to work here and there to work for just the lump sum of money... aihz...

I pledge to earn, earn and earn...

*Return of the Innocence - Enigma*

life is hard

2010-01-29T02:59:00.003+08:00

it came to a point that i felt life's hard. =X I wished I was gonna be prepared for everthing that's coming. just imagine, if whatever you have now is stripped off, you've gotta work everything out with your barehands... are you prepared? I wished it was slightly easier. everybody struggles to survive, and those who have yet to struggle will struggle more when the time comes.

There're so many things that I wished to do. And sometimes, I've gotta earn it by struggling. Money matters... Money isn't everything but without money, you can't do anything! That's why I looked into things so seriously. I couldn't forget how she told me that money didn't matter. I wished she understood. But it wouldn't matter anymore.

Good Luck Khoo Chong Ming! =) May you be blessed with abundance of wisdom...

genting - gambling

2010-01-24T13:35:00.003+08:00

felt very very relieved when exam was over. headed straight to genting for 2 nites chilling with BK, Sanjiv, Gareth and Zi Jian. I would say that I had a very fun time with em. We didn't nothing much other than chilling out, playing at the outdoor theme park and gambling in the casino.

havn't been to genting theme park for almost 6-7 years actually! It was my 1st time experiencing space shot, flying coaster, corkscrew and other exciting ride. I couldn't imagine myself again free-falling from almost 15-20 stories building! oh gosh... Can you imagine how it's like when ur heart felt like falling out? lolz...

I have more to say about gambling tho. I've indeed learnt a very good lesson with my wonderful friends. Even though I lost, but I think it was worth the moral story. We, actually I sorta discovered the real meaning of gambling. Gambling is definitely not worth the bet? lolz... It was something can is very hard to control. Gambling involves emotions! and one can HARDLY HARDLY HARDLY win when emotion is involved in gambling. The existence of greed in human being made it worst! there's no end. no one will ever want to stop when he's winning unless you set emotion aside. and no one will every stop when they're losing until you feel the pinch(no more money) unless you set emotions aside because emotion makes you want to win back the money you lost. Again, it was all about emotions and greed. That's when you see "good" gamblers don't play with emotions. The worst gamblers played with emotions. I must say that I kinda really learnt this until I lost some money. However, it was kinda fun that we thought about formulating a winning strategy to counter the house. Till then we started to realise it was all about probability. It's very hard to define luck. Good luck would indirectly mean you're playing with the probability of winning. Bad luck means you're playing at the losing side. And most of the time, it's "bad luck!" because we realised the house put things in such away that they're gonna win most of the probability!

So frankly speaking, there's no point gambling unless you're prepared to lose and have fun. There's close to nil chances of earning money from casino. And never think about winning steadily through gambling. Think about the times one win and one lose, how often do we win? and how "lucky" we are? I would recommend the luck to be put into something more constructive such as making business. At least it's gonna multiply faster than winning in a casino! So... good luck to you.

2009-12-30T14:20:00.004+08:00

can't b bothered to blog at the moment because there's nothing much to blog about. anyways, it's study break weeks and i'm all stuck with routines : study, sleep, eat, gym, basketball, music and that's about it. =)

well... certain things I realised and I missed when I looked back at the days I used to be. When you have nothing to do or bored, that's what usually happens - DAYDREAM.

I stumbled across a pic I used to take with this girl I like back in secondary school form 3. I enjoying looking at how sweet she was. It's very strange to find out that she is completely different now, far from how I imagined. Some people change and some people just remained the same. I had this malay buddy back then... sometimes we would hope good things would remain as it was, and shoo the bad ones. And there was also this girl, used to be kinda fat, sticky to mother... she's so influenced with clubbing! hahaha... things change...

Let's hope for a great New Year ahead!!! Ong ah!!! Huat ah!!! (means good luck and prosperous)

Decision Making in Life

2009-12-15T23:04:00.000+08:00

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused.
Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track.

The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange.
You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids.
However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed.
Or would you rather let the train go its way?

Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make........ ........ Pick the track first.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child.
You might think the same way, I guess.
Exactly, to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision
most people would make, morally and emotionally.
But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact
made the right decision to play at a safe place?

Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was.
This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday.
In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society,
the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority,
no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined.
And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.

The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens..
If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe.
If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake!
And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made,
we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.

'Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right.'

Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils.

WHY HAVING ENOUGHT SLEEP IS IMPORTANT...

2009-11-28T00:33:00.003+08:00

Ranjan Das Passed Away on Wednesday, 21-October-2009

http://www.enterpriseirregulars.com/1628/ranjan-das-passed-away

SAP India CEO Ranjan Das Dies After Gym Workout

http://www.indiatvnews.com/main/newsdetails.php?id=277&mod=1&smod=

Ranjan Das, CEO and MD of SAP Indian subcontinent

died after a massive cardiac arrest in Mumbai on Wednesday.

One of the youngest CEOs, he was 42

Carried : Wednesday, 11-November-2009

What killed Ranjan Das and Lessons for Corporate India

http://www.tamilbrahmins.com/general-discussions/3198-lack-sleep-cardiac-problems.html
A month ago, many of us heard about the sad demise of Ranjan Das from Bandra, Mumbai. Ranjan, just 42 years of age, was the CEO of SAP-Indian Subcontinent, the youngest CEO of an MNC in India. He was very active in sports, was a fitness freak and a marathon runner. It was common to see him run on Bandra's Carter Road. Just after Diwali, on 21st Oct, he returned home from his gym after a workout, collapsed with a massive heart attack and died. He is survived by his wife and two very young kids.

It was certainly a wake-up call for corporate India. However, it was even more disastrous for runners amongst us. Since Ranjan was an avid marathoner ( in Feb 09, he ran Chennai Marathon at the same time some of us were running Pondicherry Marathon 180 km away ), the question came as to why an exceptionally active, athletic person succumb to heart attack at 42 years of age.

Was it the stress?

A couple of you called me asking about the reasons. While Ranjan had mentioned that he faced a lot of stress, that is a common element in most of our lives. We used to think that by being fit, one can conquer the bad effects of stress. So I doubted if the cause was stress..

The Real Reason

However, everyone missed out a small line in the reports that Ranjan used to make do with 4-5 hours of sleep. This is an earlier interview of Ranjan on NDTV in the program 'Boss' Day Out': Boss' Day Out: Ranjan Das of SAP India.

Here he himself admits that he would love to get more sleep ( and that he was not proud of his ability to manage without sleep, contrary to what others extolled ).

The Evidence

Last week, I was working with a well-known cardiologist on the subject of ‘Heart Disease caused by Lack of Sleep’. While I cannot share the video nor the slides because of confidentiality reasons, I have distilled the key points below in the hope it will save some of our lives.

Some Excerpts:

· Short sleep duration ( <5 or 5-6 hours ) increased risk for high BP by 350% to 500% compared to those who slept longer than 6 hours per night. Paper published in 2009. As you know, high BP kills.

· Young people ( 25-49 years of age ) are twice as likely to get high BP if they sleep less. Paper published in 2006..

· Individuals who slept less than 5 hours a night had a 3-fold increased risk of heart attacks. Paper published in 1999.

· Complete and partial lack of sleep increased the blood concentrations of High sensitivity C-Reactive Protein (hs-cRP), the strongest predictor of heart attacks. Even after getting adequate sleep later, the levels stayed high!!

· Just one night of sleep loss increases very toxic substances in body such as Interleukin-6 (IL-6), Tumour Necrosis Factor-Alpha (TNF-alpha) and C-reactive protein (cRP). They increase risks of many medical conditions, including cancer, arthritis and heart disease. Paper published in 2004.

· Sleeping for <=5 hours per night leads to 39% increase in heart disease. Sleeping for <=6 hours per night leads to 18% increase in heart disease. Paper published in 2006.

Ideal Sleep

For lack of space, I cannot explain here the ideal sleep architecture. But in brief, sleep is composed of two stages: REM ( Rapid Eye Movement ) and non-REM. The former helps in mental consolidation while the latter helps in physical repair and rebuilding. During the night, you alternate between REM and non-REM stages 4-5 times.

The earlier part of sleep is mostly non-REM. During that period, your pituitary gland releases growth hormones that repair your body. The latter part of sleep is more and more REM type.

For you to be mentally alert during the day, the latter part of sleep is more important. No wonder when you wake up with an alarm clock after 5-6 hours of sleep, you are mentally irritable throughout the day (lack of REM sleep). And if you have slept for less than 5 hours, your body is in a complete physical mess ( lack of non-REM sleep ), you are tired throughout the day, moving like a zombie and your immunity is way down ( I’ve been there, done that ).

Finally, as long-distance runners, you need an hour of extra sleep to repair the running related damage.

If you want to know if you are getting adequate sleep, take Epworth Sleepiness Test below.

Interpretation: Score of 0-9 is considered normal while 10 and above abnormal. Many a times, I have clocked 21 out the maximum possible 24, the only saving grace being the last situation, since I don’t like to drive ( maybe, I should ask my driver to answer that line ).

In conclusion:

Barring stress control, Ranjan Das did everything right: eating proper food, exercising ( marathoning! ), maintaining proper weight. But he missed getting proper and adequate sleep, minimum 7 hours. In my opinion, that killed him.
If you are not getting enough sleep ( 7 hours ), you are playing with fire, even if you have low stress.

I always took pride in my ability to work 50 hours at a stretch whenever the situation warranted. But I was so spooked after seeing the scientific evidence last week that since Saturday night, I ensure I do not even set the alarm clock under 7 hours. Now, that is a nice excuse to get some more sleep.

Unfortunately, Ranjan Das is not alone when it comes to missing sleep. Many of us are doing exactly the same, perhaps out of ignorance. Please forward this mail/article to as many of your colleagues/friends as possible, especially those who might be short-changing their sleep. If we can save even one young life because of this email, I would be the happiest person on earth.

2009-11-22T13:31:00.003+08:00

A once upon a time glorious place has how became a filthy one. I'm refering to Pudu Plaza. It was very crowded and a place of attraction or even loitering for youngsters back in 1970s, my mum told me that because she was familiar with that area and lived there since young. I used to go there when I was still a kid and remembered how the place still considered a plaza. The place is still crowded but mostly with old folks hanging around and people living nearby the low cost areas. It was until yesterday my view changed. I went to the place with my mum to look for her Outdated Ancient-I-Call-It classic opera songs such as Tai Lui Fa, Tong Pak Fu Dim Chao Heong etc etc. My mum had to answer the call of nature but I was lagging behind that time cuz I wanted to look at some sports equipment. As I approaching the washroom to wait for her and she was already in there, I saw this lady in her 40s, wearing a white dress, with make-ups, looking "angelic" wandering around the escalator area. Because the Pudu Plaza is kinda run-down for now, I felt weird. I saw her approaching a guy in his 40s also, coming up from the escalator. And I started to think whether is she having some difficulties. It didn't bother me much until she looked me and and approached me as well. Then I was trying to listen a bit of what she wants to say, in strong china accent and a soft voice, "I help you to massage massage, very comfortable one huh..." HAHAHAHAHA!!! a prostitute approached me!!! As she was still following me because I was walking around near the toilet, I taught about how to ditch her. At first I said no no no with sign language. When I think I failed to convince her, I tried the embarrasing truth - "I'm waiting for my mother in the toilet" hehe... She was like "owh... you're mother's so young... and left" I frowned. I was smiling and smiling and I wanted to laugh. Well, I thought it was the end, but as we were walking around the plaza, I saw other chinese nationals too in the area looking similar. Then I started to feel bad.

Sometimes life could be out of our control. They could be tied to syndicates, using her to earn money or they are trying hard to earn a living. Of course, I'm sure they don't wish to resort into that but we wouldn't know what's the actual scenario unless we understand them.

useless administration

2009-11-14T14:57:00.004+08:00

several issues suddenly just pissed me off regarding poor organization and administrative systems everywhere NOWADAYS. I hope I understand myself why I'm pissing away so fast nowadays. Prolly cuz I hate seeing unorganised things going on, and they're not in perfect protocol.

1st issue was regarding SILAT-only-for-MUSLIM issue. I got this stupid e-mail by somebody somebody stating such "racist". SILAT is a martial art, who cares if you're gonna recite Quran before or after the SILAT?!!! I can just close 1 eye. The issue of racism is being sensitive to me nowadays because I hate hypocrisy of 1Malaysia.

2nd issue was a unprofessionalism of people sending e-mails to a significant amount of students to make announcement with no sense of respect and thinking it was sense of humour. This foreigner sent out e-mail requesting for feedback from fellow students with some nigga slang. So... I couldn't take it and replied to all screwing him up. perhaps suddenly I felt sense of respect and professionalism are very important.

3rd issue was seeing lazy buggers not doing their task. and yea... we hate them, and they call us racist in the end... Not just locally, but I seem to hate foreigners or I should say, I'm not longer excited over foreigners being in my country. To be exact, BLACKS. They come as if it's their house... making the wholee place look like KANDANG... showing superiority... If you're gonna call me racist, so be it.

4th issue was regarding university cafeteria with A LOT of flies infesting. I was so so so... pissed because it's like im eating near a rubbish bin! How it feels with 30-50 flies around u? If the flies know how to attack, we're invaded. it's ok. I couldn't stand it because it's been an issue of cockroaches before this and now flies. it's gonna b SA management again. Getting elected, having special rooms in university campus and not making the university a better place. The insisted to see SA president, he joked in the stupid black ppl slang, "i mean what do you want me to do? chase the flies away? (making running gesture)" I looked back at him seriously. then only he started being serious and ask me to send an e-mail to SA Welfare officer and CC is to him. Till now, I got no response but I know they've read the mail. I'm just waiting for a launch of No-Confidence and wipe out the whole SA committee. and also waiting for the action to call members from ministry of health. but seems that Estate Office is doing sth. damn it... haihz. However, prior to seeing SA president, I expressed disatisfaction to the Western-Food auntie about this, that bitch responded "it's like that one lah boy... IT'S FLY SEASON!!!" I wanted to respond but pulled back cuz im too disappointed. An event, Gatsby Dance show thingy was gonna hold at night there for dancing performance, and can you imagine the reputation of flies? and messiness at 1st floor?

5th issue was my friend got summoned for "speeding at 92km/h. just 2km/h extra. so... u should get wat's my frustration gonna b about.

That's about it. I'm pissed. =)

2009-11-14T00:02:00.004+08:00

sometimes i wonder how d strangest thing could happen. i spoke to somebody very closely... it was a wonderful chat... and all of a sudden after some time, the somebody seemed to not know me at all! lolz... should I call his hypocrisy or it's pure memory fade-away... or other reasons... I'm not complaining... but i'm just wondering how to forget someone you've spoken closely before. I can even remember somebody that I shook hands with! or even smiled with...

kuala kubu bahru

2009-11-08T21:58:00.005+08:00

went to Kuala Kubu Bahru for our 2nd coursework under Environmental Assessment. haha... I think I'm liking such courseworks. Drove all d way to KKB. It was quite a long distance though. Surprisingly when we were at the orang asli's new located area, we came across ntv7 crew who're on a mission to interview orang asli! haha... We were kinda excited la... I was listening to their conversation; trying to get some info for our assignment as well actually =) All and all, our mission was to scope around the dam located in KKB. If i'm not wrong, KKB dam supplies water to almost the whole of selangor. Snapped some pics from the info centre. Actually the fun part was going to the stream area. It actually reminded me of the 40km Ulu Yam camping trip. The river was so chilling and crystal clear. During our camping trip, we actually drank the river water and it was actually very refreshing!!!

the ugly truth.

2009-10-30T22:08:00.003+08:00

start thinking a bit... the truth about something. when somebody wants you to tell the truth, it's always ugly! i sort of start to agree with it. the ugly truth, beautiful lie. truth is always linked to reality while a lie is always in the fantasy. most of the time ppl get hurt listening to the truth. I somehow wish to find out the truth about myself to improve. but again, if only I can overcome the denial.

Good Charlotte sang a very emo song tho - The Truth. but I love it. should listen to it.

2009-10-26T18:51:00.003+08:00

Poor Jac's car got hit slightly because of some lousy driver(foreigner). I was actually quite frustrated because it turned out that she's sorta paying 50:50 for d repair of the car. How is it possible?!!! Jac's car was just parking at d roadside and d roadside was actually a lane into d hostel! Some shitty excuses given by d foreigner :
1) she parked at an illegal parking area(roadside that doesn't hav a parking spot).
2) it was dark at night, that y when d guy reversed he couldn't see. + her car was BLACK. =.="

The point is, d amatuer guy BANGED her car!!! and there's no excuse for it! and Jac gave in for d 50:50 deal because she didnt want to create a big trouble. I'm just so frust-ed when ppl get bullied esp if I know foreigners trying to bully us because overseas, foreigners r gonna bully us too if we did sth wrong. I could've just made a police report and charge d fella. sigh... frust... when I'm frust... this is it...

2009-10-19T21:13:00.003+08:00

yes... im starting to spell the word S.C.R.E.W.E.D...

this is the worse time of my life so far. I have to change my FYP title... which i'm behind time for 4 weeks. 4 weeks dont seem a lot and dont seem little... but I have so many things in hand to deal and settle... =( 1st decision made wrong 4 my FYP. haihz...

OM MANI PADME HUM

2009-10-18T12:45:00.003+08:00

These 6-character words are actually very powerful chant which I think most people wouldn't know.

< These 6 characters together make up the Six Character Great Bright Mantra, each one individually is able to emit brilliant light.

The first character is "nan" (sanskrit : OM). When you recite "nan" once, all ghost and spirits must place their palms together. Why do they put their palms together? To maintain the rules and regulations. Conforming to the regulations, they follow the correct way. Recite this one character all ghost and spirits don't dare to rebel and create confusion; they don't dare to disobey orders. This is the first sound in the Mantra "Mani" (sanskrit : Mani) means 'silent wisdom'. Using wisdom one is able to understand all principles, and thus is able to be silently extinguished, without production. It is also defined as 'seperating from filth' which means leaving all dust and filth. It can be compared to the 'precious as you will pearl' which is extremely pure, with no defilement. Whatever excellence you wish to bring forth, if you have the 'precious as-you-will pearl' it can be done. It can also fulfill your wishes in accord with your thoughts. Every vow you make will be fulfilled. These are its benefits.

"Pa mi" (sanskrit : PADME) actually should read "pa t'e mi". It means 'light perfectly illuminating" and is also defined as 'the opening of the lotus'. It is analogous to the wonderful lotus flower which can complete, perfect and fulfill without obstruction. It is the wonderful mind of Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva. This is "pa mi".

Next come "hung" (sanskrit : HUM) which means 'put forth'. Anything at all can be born from this character "hung". It also means 'to protect and support'. Recite this character and all Dharma protectors and good spirits come to support and protect you. It also means 'eradicating disasters'. Recite this character and whatever difficulties there are will be eradicated. It also means 'success' whatever you cultivate can be accomplished. >

2009-10-17T02:11:00.005+08:00

nope... not a good sign for d days ahead... damn it!!! sigh...

went back 2 amsteel and got some freaking bad news. sh*t... d plant isn't gonna implement d project i'm looking into. u know wat? for that moment i was stunned n couldn't express much of myself in front of d manager. everything seems like a lie of what he'd been telling me! i still put on d smile, but my heart frankly was going wild a bit. and I think i'm in deep shit for suggesting my own FYP title.

somehow I cant put d blame on anybody else esp d manager even though he'd been trying 2 convince me 2 take up d project. it's d directorate meeting that's causing this project 2 halt. it's quite an "unforseen" circumstance.

I dont know y... but i think i need wisdom n guidance to push me forward on wat i have to do. if there was someone who would console me...

I need to fix this issue asap. FYP is giving me F**ing lotsa headache!!! an idiotic lecturer is giving me a prob, my essay... somehow my heart keeps telling me that I'm capable of fixing this prob. please... im getting fed up...

i'm able to see that nobody cares the crap out of u when u're working. especially d high profile ppl. I "think" I know what it means by tough working world. I "think" I know how it would mean to "survive" in d working world. =( I "think" I know how much u'd need 2 good in all aspects to CLIMB up 2 d next corporate level.

2009-10-11T10:44:00.002+08:00

hi =) havnt been blogging 4 a while cuz been busy and done feel like blogging.

Anyway, I noticed my lifestyle changed slightly after beginning my final yr. I feel final yr has elevated me to another way of life. What are the obvious changes?

- I started writing/scribbling watever my progress on a book that I decided to carry around whereever I go. It's quite an irony cuz I used to be forced to do jot my tasks when I was in primary school, yet was reluctant. Now I think it's very good and cool! Prolly cuz it's my final yr now, and watever findings I got I need to immediately jot down on a log book b4 I forget.

- I sleep quite early and get up early!!! hrmmz...

- I felt like travelling more, going 2 places more instead of going my things at home. That's y I decided to take up Environmental Assessment module instead of all boring engineering modules.

- I guess I'm more serious now compared to before. I feel I'm spending most of my time thinking and trying to organise myself.

Somehow I think I should still have some fun hanging out... hrmmz...

Last again, can't wait to play basketball tmr!!!

2009-09-28T23:23:00.001+08:00

1st day back to uni... gotta say... "everything's gonna b fine..." =)

the fast penang + ipoh trip

2009-09-23T21:16:00.035+08:00

erm... some of my "photography" skills while i was in penang and ipoh... haha...
--------------------------------Kek Lok Si-----------------------------------

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------ASIA CAFE in Penang Hill!!!--------------------------

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------Batu Ferringgi------------------------------------

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------Ipoh - Hor Fun-----------------------------------

2009-09-19T23:29:00.003+08:00

goin 2 penang tmr. but im F#$%ing nt excited now. i guess it's cuz of small shit happening recently. b4 this, im very eager. my feeling now is like... im goin 2 down to kl as usual rather than goin 2 sumwhere far n adventurous. Prolly cuz im expecting more than what i m now. I dont speak to my cousin specifically anymore cuz of certain thing happened in d past. I dont wish d same thing would happen to other ppl tho but when shit happened, we cant change it.

aft chatting with Dr. Yap, I feel issue arises due to GENERATION problem. Every generation creates a mindset. but I guess Dr. Yap is the middle-man between my generation and my parents generation. and I'm goin 2 b d middle-man of the coming generation. As agreed by Dr. Yap, I also don't understand y is it so hard to communicate with the father. In fact, everybody seems to be similar, it's just d matter of seriousness, be it son or daughter. then I figured out sth out of d topic, "if a norm is easy to change, racial unity could've been achieved overnite."

there're a lot of things I miss in the past. I miss my ex. but it's d past. It doesnt mean I dont appreciate. I miss how my childhood was like with my grandmother. All I can do now is think back and miss it, and move along...

some of u might not b familiar with him. but when I was in my primary school, he's very cool to me. lolz... got ppl say I look like richie ren. haha... anyway... it's a very meaningful song that describes my mood.

2009-09-18T00:01:00.001+08:00

Just wouldn't sleep well and stay indoor.

Worry and Fear

2009-09-15T04:17:00.002+08:00

the title interested me to read on. I'd like to quote.

Man has to pay the price of fear and worry in order to be man. Our susceptibility to anxiety is the soil of our human growth.

'Your sorrow is caused by your own actions, arising from your own ignorance. I will teach you how to remove that sorrow for yourself. But you must work to gain it.'

Your worries never solve your problems; instead ruin you physically and mentally and never help you in any aspect for your own benefit.

Fear is the child of selfishness or ignorance.

'Wheresoever fear arises, it arises in a fool, not in the wise man.' Fear are nothing more than states of mind. One's state of mind is subjected to control and direction; the negative use of thought produces our fears: the positive use realizes our hope and ideals and in their cases the ability to control his own mind. Nature has endowed man with absolute contol over but one thing, and that is everything which man create begins in the form of thought, leads one very near principle by which fear may be mastered.

The fear of poverty is without doubt, the most destructive of 6 basic (poverty, criticism, ill-health, loss of love of someone, old age and death)

'Try doing something for someone.' If for instance, your mind is completely occupied with an unselfish desire to help someone else, you can't be harbouring fear at the same time.

If you have learned how to please others, you're always in jolly good mood. This is because your mind does not allow worries to accomodate in it.

2009-09-12T16:54:00.005+08:00

finally had my LAST day of volunteering in the zoo... =) had enuf of it edi. I was placed under primates last wed. I realised something under primates; last time ppl used to say "u're so naughty... as naughty as a monkey!!!" U'll actually understand why when u go to d zoo under primates section! hahaha... I encountered I freaking naughty aka playful monkey there. As the routine in d morning was cleaning up d cages, we went 2 d cages 1 by 1 cleaning up d shits and leftover rottened foods. it sticks a bit tho. =)

Some of the monkey are very tame that when you go in, they'll stay 1 side, cuddling their babies fearing u'll take them away. while some are slightly aggressive ones, that d zookeeper had to isolate them at one corner before doing the routine. It was then the turn to cleaning up this "baby" monkey's cage; she's called GIRL. This monkey is not isolated when I see she's still hoping around near us even when we're approaching their cage. I was kinda skeptical and asked if she had to be cage or nt. haha... when we got in, d 1st thing Girl did was hop onto my head, she started pulling my ears, hitting my head, tugging my head, and pinching my neck. I was like F**K and I shouted, "OI!!!!" lolz... d zookeeper immediately warned Girl to go further. Then I looked at Girl furiously, the keeper said she's very "playful". I was like PLAYFUL?! she pinched me!!! it's painful! I asked him if I can whack her if she comes near me. then my hand was getting ready to whack her when she's approaching me. swt... the zookeeper laughed at me, he said she's still a baby, playful and the light scratch I got was prolly cuz her nails werent cut.

We continued cleaning, but my eyes was being watchful at her. =D I observed her, she's climbing around, trying to approach me. Whereever I go, she'll b following me! but nt d zookeeper. Till 1 time she sat at d side observing me; at that point ONLY I thought she's behaving like a human being. haha... This is the main experience I had under primates.

Regarding other details, Finally got my FYP titles settled. but I still have psycho-effect of it.

Stupid babi sial Girl! I hate little monkeys... I'd prefer OuRangggg Outen (Orang Utan)

cars!!!

2009-09-08T23:46:00.002+08:00

omg... d more i look at cars... i more im feeling wild!!! each time i look at a car passing by me, I must look at it... then I start to analyse the car details... exterior, interior and their specifications! gee gee gee... now im more into street racing type of cars... I guess when I'm older, i'll d more into professional racing development cars... hahaha...

I just cant wait to create my own debut of customized vios! very soon... very soon... within this 2 weeks. hehe...

Meanwhile... I've selected the FYP titles... well... I just dunno wat 2 say... watever comes ahead I wouldn't b bothered... *fingers crossed*

zookeeping

2009-09-07T21:29:00.004+08:00

headed to Zoo Negara early in d morning... =) surprisingly it wasn't jam. Edwina placed me under reptile section. I havnt been back to zoo negara since standard 6 lolz... tatz y i felt like goin back there n hav a look as well as hav sum fun. Everything there was still more or less the same.

When I arrived, Mr. Hafiz assigned me to do some clean up around d reptile section. 1st thing was cleaning up a few tortoise area. hehe... I gotta say it's nt easy 2 clean tho. most of d time we think zookeepers duty is cool, cuz we see them handling animals; but actual fact when it comes to maintenance n cleaning... it's tedious!!! I was playing with the toitoises while doing some cleaining tho. XD Besides me, there're a few more volunteers as well... but most of em r foreigners. Sara, Anna, KT n Ryan. I just cant understand y foreigners love to do these kinda job. btw, reptile section reminds me of Crocodile Hunter! swt... at 1st I tot I was gonna b cool like Croc. Hunter. it's kinda dangerous tho, u look at d crocs, they dont move... then suddenly it strikes! -.-"

Spent most of d morning cleaning tortoise area. Afternoon was a tougher job! Cleaning monitor lizards area! =) hahaha... The water there was congested, n there were lotsa mud n soils under the water. I had to dig up all d soil and make way for the water to flow - very energy consuming. The monitor lizard was actually around me when I was cleaining it. but it wasn't really dangerous tho... as long as I dont bother them. I was kinda cool tho... there's a guy wondering if the monitor lizard would harm me;then i felt like a zookeeper edi. hahaha... while cleaning... out of nowhere i learn a "mourning" sound. I went to check, it was actually orgasm sound made tortoise! hahaha!!! I took a pic n video of it tho. hehe... I didnt know tortoise cane make sound 1...

Actually I dont see many visitors around in the zoo anymore like how it used to be years back. sigh... I guess we're losing touch with nature n wild animals...

The monitor lizards r actually behind me n I was at their "swimming pool".

few other snakes they kept for photographing.

wake me up when september ends

2009-09-04T22:58:00.004+08:00

Summer has come and passed... The innocent can never last... WAKE ME UP WHEN SEPTEMBER ENDS...

everytime it's like this... before u have fun, u cant wait 4 it... while u're having fun, u're doing nothing much... when fun's gonna over, u think time flies...

damn... september is here! gonna start school soon! this is gonna b my final yr man...

list of my agendas for september :

1) FYP : title will be release coming tuesday.

2) Zookeeping : commencing on the coming monday. however, planning to do it for 5 days.

3) Penang trip : planning it aft zookeeping week.

4) Car modification : - bodykit is expected to arrive next week.
- thinking of adding 3D carbon lamination
- smoking the headlights
- hunting for TRD logo
- TRD logo tyre cap
- looking into tyre rim details soon

omg omg omg... im getting obsessed with cars... sigh... it seems that my wish to change the headlights to white xenon light is not so possible anymore cuz actual JPJ-Sirim approved white lights are different from Retrofitted white lights. unless TRD or Vios manufacturers come out with a special headlights for xenon ones.

melacca day trip

2009-08-31T02:19:00.005+08:00

kinda interesting day cuz i was in malacca just nw. few hundreds km of drive. it's nice to go back 2 a place where u've been before. of course... i rmb i was there for huge camp. i recalled many things on my way there tho. the whole jonkers streets. i rmb how things were that time. i tried to look back for the pair of umbrellas there I used to take pic with tho.

but it wasn't there. =) it was sweet n bitter to recall things there. i still rmb there's this guy who was always getting on my way during huge camp. I still rmb everthing I observed that time as I walked through the jonkers streets.

nevertheless, I saw Burhan there... unexpectedly... lolz... with somebody else... =D

i think im better looking now than before! hehehe...

modelling?

2009-08-26T21:46:00.006+08:00

hrmmz... sth came across my mind... i wonder how's the life of a model in reality. mayB a celebrity? im refering more specifically local models that're trying to work their way to the top.

as I browsed through pics of models, I tried to imagine their personal lifestyle and how their mentality would be like, in general. I wonder how they'd actually end up being a model. what drove them to that field. When I see models posing and posing, I wonder what're they thinking at the moment. is it fame? Glamourous? like what's sung by Fergie? they appear to be so confident!!! the expressions... how they actually maintain the figure? was it all sufferings that we cant see in front?

secondly, the people around them. easily they have XXXXXX number of fans and "friends". I wonder how the "friends" think of her. are they actually up to sth? are they sincere?

wat would happen if the model's face is scared? how they'd see themselves in 10 yrs to come? are they thinking of looking for Mr. Rich to marry? Well... honestly im curious. many ppl r trying to climb up to be models and earn money. some r different frm Amber Chia. some had to go round posing with bikinis to lure contractors to look for them. some had to expose themselves so much. hrmmz...

Sometimes I imagined myself being in their position. The benefits that they'd get r... widening their horizons... networking... cute friends... but there r sides which they have to hide. lesser privacies... i also wonder how different they r from me. are they stupid-er than me? lolz... just know how to pose around... showing their feminine side.

2009-08-19T22:03:00.002+08:00

hrmmz... everything seems 2 b almost done...

finally got a lecturer's willing to take me for my Final Yr Project title!!! but i still dunno whether it's a good thing or a bad thing... lolz...

after ups n downs... finally placed a deposit for the car bodykit and spoiler... =) can't wait 2 see d new look of d car!!!

still deciding on tinted films... bloody bugger trying to cheat me!!! no way man... lolz...

2009-08-14T22:46:00.003+08:00

looks up... looks down... looks left... looks right...

eric eric... now im wondering... Mechanical Engineering... hrmmz... ENGINEER...

seems easy but it's not leh... hrmmz... AHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wat d hell m i doin? hrmmz...

can't wait to finish up wat i'm doing n do other stuffs... feeling sick with research psychossssss...

2009-08-08T00:21:00.006+08:00

it seems that I still think about this particular girl even though I dont really get to see her after some time. i'm a realistic/practical person. i understand the possible factors behind what's happening with me. of course, no matter how much you think you can love, share your life with a person, it would also depends on whether the person's willing to do the same as well. That's actually the difficulty in making a match. striving hard so that u wouldnt want your "baby" to strive with u next time? or so that she could be a housewife instead? those were the thoughts. it's a bit too far. i know but those are REAL, no fairy tales behind. Everything else can be very complicated, but one thing is, i'd only wish for a simple love. im letting fate to decide. but at d same time, im keeping fingers crossed. i'm a free-thinking buddhist. but i somehow know that god has better plans for us. =) good luck eric!

there're always the other side of good news behind every bad news. i can never deny that after experiencing it so many times. this month, i can think of TWO! =) i dont mind sharing my testimonies with you.

2009-08-05T23:19:00.003+08:00

sigh... Im in such a dilemma on my Final Year Project. I wished this were much more easier and smooth as how I wished. =( God... pls guide me...

Adrian's 21st Bday

2009-08-02T14:12:00.005+08:00

had a great fun yday... it's Adrian's 21st Bday celebration. another gathering with my primary school friends. glad 2 still contact with em till now. better that we're able to click on so well. =) would like to see how else everyone would turn out to be in d next 5-10 years. here're some pics to view.

2009-08-01T00:00:00.004+08:00

I suppose I'm having a special interest in(WATCHING) ballet dancing after watching The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. NOT I LIKE BALLET DANCING. I just fancy the moves, not the outfit(skirt) cuz it looks funny to me. I guess it's a very expressive dance, it can even express love as well as u know... just like ballroom dancing, but not latin dancing. =) well... the science behind the story can be unreal, but I still get what the author tries to convey. I was trying to feel how Benjamin would feel; grow up watching people closest die first.

hahaha...

2009-07-22T21:12:00.001+08:00

wat would u do if u got into that situation while thousands of eyes r watching u?

2009-07-16T22:27:00.002+08:00

sth triggered my thoughts yday after attending a talk. sth that kinda of changed how i would want my future to be. hrmmz... sometimes we think we've seen enough; it's never ending. Nothing ends but life. I remember my mum was encouraging me to study last time, she said i just havto pass thru this stage, n it's all gonna b over. well... until i came to realise that it was just a form of motivation until i come to realise myself, to be independent. Obstacles after obstacles, I tried to go through it one by one, hoping that I could see the light in the end. In fact, it's all about obstacles, it never ends, that's what life is all about. the obstacles are just there to shape your characteristics, changing the way to see the creation.

Starter for Ten

2009-07-12T18:10:00.002+08:00

I'm on a movie streak these 2 days. Here're some things I'd like 2 share from this movie that I thought might b motivating.

"the people who really care about u dont mind if you make mistakes.it's wat u do next tat matters.and u cant see that, then u're not smart as i tot u were." - Jackson's mum

"I admit it, I've made some mistakes, ok... some big mistakes... loads of em.but u cant hide in ur room 4ever feeling sorry 4 urself. it's not practical. at some point u've gotta get back out there,face out with things, and confront ur demons.

and yes... i've made some bad choices, logde my head, ppl i let down, ppl i care for,but there's still time to get something right. Eversince I remember, I wanted to be clever. some ppl r borned clever, someway some ppl r borned beautiful, I'm not 1 of those ppl, i've gotta work for it, put in d effort. If im missing out, I learn from it. Besides, sometimes it's not about knowing d right answer, sometimes it's about asking the right question." - Jackson's voice.

Su Mi Ma Sen, Love

2009-07-11T11:38:00.004+08:00

yes... I actually watched a love movie. actually it was great!!! I liked the author's storyline tho. Eventhough the ending is skeptical, but I guess it ending shouldn't be determined by the author himself. that's y I think it's perfect; you wouldn't say it's faked. I do believe in sth called Fate, but to what extent is the question. ok la... I was moved...

2009-07-10T23:53:00.000+08:00

Im so excited!!!

2009-07-05T23:10:00.004+08:00

sometimes I think we only learn how to be grateful only when we see things happening in front of us. you just wont know what to say.

I was driving back to my hometown just nw at nite. I've been seeing this for some times. Usually at nite, I'll see people walking on d road, holding stacks of photocopied NOMBOR EKOR results to make some money. They wait for the traffic lights to turn red, then they start walking from d beginning till d end, looking for ppl to buy their copy. I watched them. I guess 1/25 or sometimes NONE! would buy the photocopied paper. It's sold 40c per piece. Come on! how much can you earn?! I don't know. They don't carry a lot of photocopied paper, cuz they dont wanna risk keeping extra copies. so i guess d cost would b 5c to 10c per paper. How long can your night go? 4-5 hrs? How many times of red lights? each green light you walk to d beginning. How long can you stand? I think 80% of ppl buy newspapers n able to check it without buying.

I'm just speechless. My heart of kinda cold. It's at night and I bet it's not gonna be the main source of income for him. I paid him RM1 and asked him to keep the change. In my heart, I thought if I had the money, I'd just pay him rm30 and make him happy for the day. Naturally crimes can happen when we're fighting for survival! There're ppl out there trying to make ends meet, and there're also ppl clubbing almost every week. I feel like laughing when I hear ppl saying, "eh!!! next week let's go Poppy!!!". Of course, I did say those kinda things b4, so I laugh at myself for saying that too. Now I wouldnt. I hope god would bless them and give them a better next life. We should play a part in making the society a better one.

Elephant Mindset

2009-07-05T00:10:00.002+08:00

A very inspiring incident I'd like to share. Perhaps I could retype the passage again.

"As my friend was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by d fact tat these huge creatures were being held by only a rope tied 2 their legs. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime break away from ropes they were tied to but for some reason, they didnt. My friend saw a trainer nearby and asked why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away.

well, he said, (when they r young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them n at tat age, it's enuf to hold them. As they grow up, they're conditioned 2 believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they nvr try to break free.) My friend was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but they believed they couldn't, they were stuck right where they were. The powerful and gigantic creature has limited its present abilities by limitations of its past.

Like elephants, how many of us go through life holding onto a belief that we cannot do sth, simply because we failed at it once b4? how many of us refude 2 attempt sth new n challenging cuz our so called MINDSET?"

YOUR ATTEMPT MAY FAIL, BUT NEVER FAIL TO MAKE AN ATTEMPT.

CHOOSE NOT TO ACCEPT THE FALSE BOUNDARIES AND LIMITATIONS CREATED BY THE PAST.

2009-06-30T21:19:00.002+08:00

>.<" wahhhh... seriously... entering FINAL year already... i can feel a thing called... SH*T.

Tribute to MJ - King of Pop

2009-06-27T23:32:00.003+08:00

Some people might criticise him for changing the way he's suppose to be, but I think he's the person with a lot of determination to be a SUPERstar and legend to us. Best All Time Entertainer by Guiness Book of Records.

Knowing

2009-06-27T12:13:00.002+08:00

another fantastic movie I've watched. Fantastic in a sense that the author tries to convey msg-es in a creative manner. I've noticed the trend of movies nowadays are more into global warming and aliens... hahaha... now going back to interesting aliens... last time was action-packed james bond, tom cruise... b4 tat was aliens... =) again... i'd suggest ppl to watch this show though there're kinda freaky scenes... most of d time my bulu roma naik... hahaha...

21st birthday + gathering

2009-06-15T00:17:00.003+08:00

Had a happy birthday and gathering with primary school friends... =) will post up photos later...

2009-06-08T20:46:00.002+08:00

I'm starting to feel a fear, fear of how will I be in years to come. I don't know y I have to fear but I guess it's because I'm starting to expect much, thinking beyond. The feeling was actually like how I felt when I first entered secondary school - fearing of losing out in society and I can't cope with my studies. Just the difference is I m able to manage myself better than before. Reflecting on the workers and staffs of various levels, this 1st new week of training experience led me to putting myself into their shoes. I felt that I need to start doing something now if I want to achieve my target/dream.

My parents asked me what I want for my 21st. It seems that 21st is a big deal FOR A MOMENT, but somehow I guess it's nothing special. M i missing a great opportuniy? Then I started seriously thinking... what I want? I told em, it seems that I don't want anything from them. because watever I want will depend on my effort and my determination to get it. yes, I want money, but I don't want a temporary amount of money, I want the money that can REPLICATE!

I think I'm racing against time to be independent because I'm going 2 be in society contributing in a year from now. That is the reason y I insisted in driving at night back to hometown. I have the fear and I know the risk, but I want to encounter it. in fact, yesterday I was kinda scared. hahaha... cuz I unknowingly took a whole new route down. of course, many things were going thru my mind that time. =) if you asked me whether it was right or wrong, I'd say I chose it, there's no right or wrong. there's a consequence.

I'm still observing.

心跳

2009-06-07T09:05:00.012+08:00

Going back to the point where I first saw you,
Got some words in my mind I can't bring out saying,
If you see this girl can you tell me where she is,

I was determined to make the move,
aint fooling but for the unforeseen that I saw,
the memory of a lifetime,

Going back to the place we first dine,
Smiling in the heart all time,
All means to cheer her,

The hall of night,
Can't wait to whisper to you as scenes were going on,
The harmony of duo I'm addicted to,

I was extremely hyped the day before the hike,
Climax just like the peak but not cloud nine,
But it was the last I'm closest to you,

Your friends,
It takes time to understand,

I'm definitely not an octopus nor a jerk,
I was just an oridinary person,
looking for the special heart,

I tried hard to explain,
Maybe I was fate,
A failed obstacle,

As I recalled,
I felt it was a missed oppurtunity,
Only if the cupid would come back one day,

Your love is pure,
I saw an angel,
Yes, she caught my eyes,

I saw her face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
Cause I'll never be with you,

I wished I could write more,
But I guess it's done,
Cause I'll never be with you.

1st day with Amsteel

2009-06-01T23:21:00.002+08:00

hahaha... got kinda nervous 2day while on my car to the industry cuz i tot i got lost on the very 1st day. =) I guess working in an industry from 8.30am-6pm is very tiring!!! hahaha... n i guess im calling it a day so fast. it's 11.30 already aft I came back from work and played badminton with my uncle and his friends.

I know there'll b a lot of things 2 learn about in this training. well... I hav no time to upload pics and elaborate on it cuz of limited online time and i need to sleep early! however, I'll try doing it on saturday. 1 thing bad about working is that u cant sleep late! cuz u cant afford 2 do mistakes while working, it either jeopardize your image or post a danger 2 u esp u dont wanna get banged by ongoing heavy metal equipments. see ya!

2009-05-29T21:54:00.001+08:00

guess which one's me? you will never get it right. however, there's a hint. I'm the mischievious in class.

2009-05-29T00:52:00.002+08:00

I just noticed something. it's not there anymore. no big deal but I'm thinking y. hrmmz... I... wish it was just a time-freeze.

childhood memories!!!

2009-05-27T00:58:00.026+08:00

oh my goodness... I received an e-mail... about kids born in 1988. well... I guess there's a specific thing that we do in every "era". I felt all the nostalgic aft reading the mail and I feel like telling about it!

I remember this chewing gum which I used to buy all the time when I was still staying with my grandma. I think that's the most popular chewing gum available that time. hahaha... I think this brand loses it's competition cuz it has lotsa colouring in it. to be frank, I do get one of these 2 eat once in a blue moon cuz I love the memories!

This choco was my favourite! I remember there's another 1 similar to smarties but packed in a form of digit 8.

Fighting fish!!! or watever u call it. I used to call fightingi fish in mandarin! oh my goodness... of course I play tat!!! I used to rare it when I was with my grandma! I remember playing fish-fighting with my cousins and my elder bro... hahaha... and I remember where's the location I played the fish-fighting - it's just at the living room of my grandma's hse.

sugus sugus!!! hahaha... one of the sweets that i'd chew and swallow quickly liek nobody's business last time.

He-man!!! I remember this fella... when I was with my grandma, my parents mailed a He-man with two of his tigers to me! 2gether with the armor of the tiger!

"I'm popeye the sailor man, i'm popeye the sailorman,... cuz i ate the spinach, i'm popeye the sailorman! toot toot!" hahaha... last time after I watch this show, I'd be so excited to eat vege, and I'd ask my grandma/mom, which one's spinach! actually now if i watch the cartoon again, I feel lifeless. lolz!!!

Doraemon! even tho I don't quite like it, but i watch em too! just for the sake of wasting time like small kids. I think I prefer sailormoon last time!!! lolz... This was the time I was in primary school between standard 1-3, aft coming back from school, i'd watch it.

same goes to dragon ball. but I was more influenced by this tho. I even drew all sorts of dragon ball drawings. I was quite obsessed with this anime with my bro. esp my elder bro, he has his collections of sketches! and omg omg... WE DREW A BIG DRAGONBALL FAMILY SKETCH B4! it was at least 6-7 combined A4 size papers! I wish I had it now. we pasted it in our room! and guess wat, my elder bro is Goh-Ku, I'm Goh-Han, my younger bro is Goh-Tien.

TORA TORA. there's another 1 called JOJO which came out aft that. hahaha... when I was at my grandma's hse, i'd buy this to reveal the mystery gift they hav inside! I never bother much about the choco they gave tho cuz it sucked! lolz... but when I was hungry, I'd just stuff it in my mouth. hehe...

these small soldiers my cousin used to collect em! hahaha... my memory about this was in my cousin's hse. I remember the scene where we spilled all the soldiers out on the floor and arrange it for battle! somehow we "battled"

I don't know how we played this Family Card game but I remember I used to play it.

Back To The Future!!! I guess I was quite grown up when I watched this movie. nth very special tho. but I remember Hollywood Hulkhogan! my favourite wrestler!b4 The Rock.

Rubber rubber... hahaha... I don't call it Eraser that time. no need to say, I played the rubber game with my friends in LOWER primary school. it was just a stupid stacking game. lolz... but i remember making whole lot of collections in the UPPER secondary school! putting baby powders to make it smoother... trading it with friends... hehehe...

Gogo Power Ranger!!! hahaha... yes! this is exactly the correct generation that I watch last time. there're so many generations goin on now. again, my elder bro is Green/White ranger, I'm black ranger, my younger bro's blue ranger, my younger sis who was still a baby tat time, we labelled her the pink ranger.

awww... it was so technological and trendy to have such a "sophisticated" pencil box last time! hahahaha!!! but I dont think I had one b4 cuz couldn't afford i guess. haihz... or mayB i spent it on the rubbers! hahaha...

This is the best one... my grandma had this "piano" for me! it was yellow colour!!! as usual la... trying to play like beethoven tat time. hehehe...

yea yea... I remember this... =) my elder cousin used to blow big big bubbles for me to play with, and there's a specific way to save the burst bubbles.

I don't know wat's d fun of playing this but I remember having this when i was a baby boy. =)

yeah yeah... this gun! hahaha... it existed when I was with my grandma but i didnt get the chance to play it until i shifted to KL and bought play with the maternal cousins.

Thunder Cats!!! hahaha... yeah yeah... I love watching it too. I remember getting excited with the leopard chick tho. haha...

hahaha... this is a fun game when I was still in lower primary school. I'd play this with my cousins and bro in the car while on the way back from school. but it's slightly diff tho. we changed it to sum stupid things like "玩八蛋... 臭鸡蛋... etc etc" =) hehe...

hahaha... this toy... it's the asian version, similar to the train one ppl play in overseas tho. I used to have this. hehe...

There're still so many more!!! hahaha... sometimes I wished I had a time machine just to get back there and look properly how I was b4. we seriously cant bring back time. Therefore, I trully wish to appreciate my time now and maximise watever I can do meanwhile.